


What Ifs

by VermilionStar



Category: Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor 2
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Implied/Referenced Sex, Post-Canon, Post-Triangulum Arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 11:30:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18637261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VermilionStar/pseuds/VermilionStar
Summary: Makoto and Yamato have a surprisingly deep conversation over morning coffee.





	What Ifs

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place a few years after the Triangulum Record Breaker ending.  
> Rated mature for mild sexual content referenced at the beginning.

Makoto awoke to sunbeams streaming through the window. After a large yawn and stretch, she realised she fell asleep totally nude the night before. The bed was in tatters and her significant other who tended to sleep in was strangely absent.

She quickly tossed on a plain black t-shirt and a pair of tight sport boxers. A quick look in the mirror revealed her disheveled hair and a telling pale purple mark on her collar bone. _Ah well_ , she thought, her uniform would cover that up.

“Good morning,” Makoto said with a tired smile as she walked into the kitchen.

Yamato was fully dressed at the table with legs crossed and brow furrowed as he furiously typed on laptop keys.  He acknowledged Makoto with a nod and replied with an equally tired “Good morning, Makoto,” He then abruptly stopped whatever he was typing and closed his laptop. “Sleep well?” he asked as he pulled his silver hair to the side and ran though it with his fingers. It was a small habit he had developed since growing it out, one which Makoto found to be quite endearing.

“Like a rock,” Makoto replied, as she pulled out a chair and sat across from him at their small table for two. “What have you been up to? You’re up awfully early.”

Yamato folded his arms, a motion that betrayed his slight embarrassment, “Well you see, my mind was racing after the… Excitement of last night. I thought spending my time in bed unable to sleep was time spent wasted. Therefore…  I decided to work instead.”

Makoto gave him a look that implied her thoughts of _how very much like you_.

A small ringing noise sounded throughout the kitchen.

Yamato arose from his seat, “Coffee’s ready.” He was relieved to have an excuse to cease the conversation. As exceedingly mature as he was, casual talk regarding the act of lovemaking was one thing he would likely never get used to.

As he prepared two cups, Makoto could not help but smile and admire him from across the kitchen. To her, he was that cute.

As Yamato returned to the table, he froze as soon as he noticed Makoto’s bruise from the angle above. He flushed red, due to both having caused the bruise in addition to having peered at her breasts without permission. “I apologise for that,” he said sheepishly as he placed Makoto’s mug in front of her.

Makoto shrugged, “Don’t worry about it.  Just be a bit gentler next time?”

“Noted.”

The couple sat in silence for a while, sipping at their coffee. Makoto mindlessly fiddled with her smartphone while Yamato continued tapping away on his laptop. The at first comfortable quiet turned slightly sour as Yamato noticed Makoto’s apparent unease.

“What's troubling you?” he asked, closing his laptop once again.

“Oh, you can tell?” Makoto forced a crooked smile, “It’s nothing really.”

“You can tell me.” He insisted; his expression serious.

Makoto exhaled and resigned to the coming conversation she had hoped to avoid, “Ever think about what... could’ve been?”

Yamato frowned, “I do not quite understand what you are asking.”

“Well I had a dream last night. It was a wonderful dream… I was swimming again, but I wasn’t a child in the dream, I was my current age.” There was an unmistakable sparkle in Makoto’s eye, however it was also tinged with sadness.

“I see.”

“It just made me think about. What could’ve been, you know? It’s impossible of course.”

“Why is it impossible?”

Makoto blinked, “What?”

“I said why is it impossible. There is absolutely nothing in your way now. I don’t see a reason why you shouldn’t pursue being a swimmer if it is what you truly desire.”

Makoto sighed; he saw right through her. “But...”

“Yes?”

“Hypothetically, say I did want to return to swimming, where would I even start? And then there’s JP’s, I can’t just up and leave!”

“Yes, you could. I could easily find another two... or three assistants to fill in your position.”

Makoto let out a laugh, “Three?! Really.”

“Yes, I’m being sincere. It would be virtually impossible to find a single individual as efficient and effective at your job as you are.”

Makoto took another drink of her coffee in attempt to hide a growing bashful grin, “I swear, it’s like you enjoy teasing me as much Otome and Fumi do.”

“I cannot deny that seeing your cheeks tinged with blush in response to my compliments is quite… adorable.” Yamato retorts playfully.

His voice then returned to a serious tone, “I digressed, but in all earnestness, I believe there is nothing holding you back. All that would be required would be for you work and train until you achieve what your younger self could only dream of.”

Makoto looked down at the mug she held, swirling around the remaining drops of liquid. “You really think I could do it? Even after all that’s happened?”

“Of course. Do you still think I’m speaking in jest?”

“No, no, I’m just... doubting myself I suppose.”

“Perhaps you’ve grown accustomed to this sense of normalcy you’ve developed since after defeating Canopus?”

“Maybe… No that’s not quite it.”

Yamato folds his hands and gives the older woman a smirk, “Are you perhaps too attached to me?”

Makoto laughed again. “Maybe. I love my job and this life I’ve created by chance after chance encounter.”

“But it wasn’t chance. I purposefully sought you out. As did my sister.”

Makoto gave him a look, “You know what I mean.” She continued, “You see, it’s not that I have regrets, it’s that I can’t help but wonder about the ‘what ifs’ now and then, you know?”

The conversation trailed off. Minutes ticked by once more until Makoto spoke up out of the blue.

“Do you ever wonder what could’ve been?” she asked in a low tone. “If you were never a Hotsuin perhaps?”

Yamato took a moment to collect his thoughts, “Though I cannot deny my mind wanders to ‘what ifs’, they are ultimately fleeting and pointless. I was born and forced into the role. Raised and groomed for it. I doubt any singularity would have sent me on a course of being a regular person. Well... That is unless I erase myself as I did.” He paused, “As for regrets? Absolutely none.”

“Not even regarding your once ideal meritocracy?” Makoto pressed. She knew it was potentially dangerous territory, but she asked out of sheer curiosity nonetheless.

He did not seem to mind, “Also pointless to contemplate.”

“Really? Why is that?”

Yamato closed his eyes and inhaled sharply. “I was fueled by hatred and resentment and desire for retribution. Sheltered and foolish and blind to the hidden beauty of the world beneath all its ugliness. While I still believe a perfect meritocracy has its benefits, I know deep within my heart of hearts that that potential world would have failed and I along with it.”

Makoto could only stare at the man as she was speechless.

“I now live in a world where I can see that hidden beauty. That hope in despair. That love in hatred.” He stopped for a moment then continued, “Had I gone down that path I would have never have experience all I have now.”

The woman was once again reminded of her own feelings. She set down her empty mug on the table.

The young man reopened his eyes. His expression softened as his violet eyes gazed lovingly at his significant other, “If you somehow still feel indebted to me, let me make it clear as crystal that you’ve repaid it tenfold.”

Yamato stood up and circled around the table over to Makoto in order to lean in close enough to her that she could feel his breath on her skin. “Listen Makoto, I adore you and I want you to live your life how you choose.”

Makoto’s heart fluttered as hard as if this had never happened between them. She wondered how he managed to make her feel as if she were falling in love again and again so easily. One of her hands found its way to the nape of Yamato’s neck, the other caressed the soft skin of his cheek.

“My one condition is that you let me remain your lover of course,” he whispered.

He kissed her gingerly on the forehead, then again on the lips.

“Don’t worry," she assured, "I’m not going anywhere anyway. This life is perfect to me.”

After their unexpected heavy conversation and embrace, the pair pulled away from each other and their morning routines resumed as usual.

Later, the two set out for another day of work.

Together.


End file.
